never say "never", except...

...NEVER leave early, when training.

I started my preceptorship this past Wednesday night. I went in eager as all get-out, only to find out my preceptor was not working that night. It was some sort of mix-up, most likely due to my crazed thought processes. Because we have to get in enough hours to finish our schooling I had no choice, but to stay, as long as someone would keep me. Luckily, someone did.

It was a pretty slow night, especially considering the chaos that had ensued during days, and even the previous several days and nights. One a.m. rolled around and since it was my first night shift in about 18 years, and I hadn't slept well in preparation for it, when my RN said something about leaving early on call, I was all for it. Then we had someone walk in with abdominal pains. Long story, short: she was gone within two hours. So three a.m. rolls around and we're sent packing.

I'd thought to myself that I should stay, as you never know what you might miss in your given opportunities, and well heck I had stayed awake up to that point. Alas, I'd gotten 8 hours in and I knew I could squeeze the lacking 4 out somewhere else, so my exhaustion won out. I don't know that anyone would have let me stay anyway.

Wouldn't you know, when I get in Thursday night I hear about the labor patient that came in breech, and all hell broke loose, after we'd left. They had problems during the labor AND the baby had problems. Now, I would never wish any of that on anyone, but for the purposes of training, experience - good or bad - is like gold.

"Horrible" was the term I heard over and over in reference to the whole situation. I'd say it's pretty accurate, because it's how I feel having missed it.

It's all good though. I survived my first stretch of night shifts and thoroughly enjoyed it. I look forward to the next two weeks and pray, hope and wish to find something in what I now think is my niche, family birthing/L&D.