can't even blame the dogs

Really, you can't because it has nothing to do with dogs for the most part.



Lately when I 've been working in my gardens I've noticed patches of odd looking stuff. When I spray them with the hose nozzle a brown smokish substance emits from them. I figured they were some sort of mold or fungus. Come to find out it's what is called "dog vomit fungus". The patches aren't really a type of fungus, they are a type of slime mold. It's is more accurately called "dog vomit slime mold".



I am happy to learn it is harmless, if not scarey and will go away on its own. I'll probably still play with any patches I come across and spray them into oblivion.


You can see me spraying in the second photo, the glob of dog vomit slime mold the brown smokish stuff which is actually spores. Then the last photo is the end product that will hopefully just go away.

i've seen better days

weeks even

This week has shaped up to be a rough one as of yet.

Let's start with the highlights:

~AW made it out of the 7th grade. This is wonderful news, albeit it shouldn't be anything out of the ordinary, but when one is unsure if their child will in fact be promoted to the next grade one is happy when it happens.

~Dr. B's office called and left me a voicemail the other day notifying me that I am not menopausal. Great news, but what's up with leaving a message? Isn't that anti-HIPAA? But hey! I'm not menopausal!!

and now I'm drawing a blank

Now the low points:

Monday started out great, until my brother-in-law called. He was calling to get Big B's work phone number because their uncle had passed away the night before. Let's not forget what this past Sunday was...Father's Day. Uncle F had been battling Alzheimer's Disease for several years and had a heart attack amidst his sons and daughters on Sunday, June 21, 2009.

We drove up to NJ Tuesday for the viewing. I was ok until I saw the picture of him and Aunt AM. It's one from back in the day, say about circa 1950. He's in his sailor's uniform, she's all dolled up looking beautiful. The whole Korean War veteran thing got me. We had the military in common, not to mention this man was one of the good ones. Really, he was a devoted husband and father. Sad to see him go.

The funeral was yesterday morning. Afterward they had a brunch at a nearby restaurant and then the guys and I headed back home.

We arrived in time for LB to gather up his baseball gear and head out to the game. Players have to be at home games an hour and a half early. I'm discovering the advantages of him driving. After getting things back in to the house Big B and I headed out to pick up dinner at Subway, and then over to the game. It started out great. LB's been starting Right Fielder for the past several games. He had an off night last night, striking out three times. Actually that was the norm for pretty much everyone. They did get a few hits in but lost 7-5 in the end.

That's another advantage to LB driving,as a matter of fact. When they lose, and/or he doesn't play well he usually ends up grumpy. Well, I didn't have to ride along with him in his grumpiness last night!

Anyway, after dragging AW to all of the games as of late we decided to give him a chance at staying at home by himself again, since he's been behaving somewhat ok, and it's less expensive considering when concession stands are open children tend to think they need to support the local team.

Gave the kid an inch and he took a mile. Let's just say he's ruined his newfound independence and is now relegated to tagging along to this summer's future ballgames.

Seriously, I hate the middle school years. On a serious note, when your child continually does things to try your patience it not only wears your patience down it also wears away at your motherly confidence.

So, in the past 36 hours I've seen a great man's funeral, my eldest son's frustration at playing poorly at baseball (his passion), my youngest's antics as an unruly, near thug-like pre-teen, and oh, yeah, my husband and I have been fighting today!

8 hours til TGIF!

P.S. I am yet again, behind on my studies!

cat days of summer

not a care in the world

bedhead


how dare you disturb my slumber??

indulgences

This isn't about sin or purgatory. So much in life is precious and should be cherished, even indulged upon. Yet, so much is taken for granted.

indulge: to take unrestrained pleasure in
-Merriam-Webster Dictionary

Today is Father's Day. I live in Virginia and my father lives in Texas. We see each other once a year, if we're lucky. Today I undulged in the love I have for my husband, the father of my children. Sometimes I take him for granted. Today I decided to get up and make him breakfast rather than going out.

I decided to try and copycat a recipe for the scrumptious donuts at The Apple House. They're these wonderful, sinful little apple, cinnamon morsels of pleasure. Far be it from me to deep fry anything, as I don't do it very often. I decided to go on the hunt and see if I could make something similar. We have some Aunt Jemima Whole Wheat pancake mix, and wouldn't you know it, right there on the box is a recipe for Pancake Muffins.



It calls for:

* 2 cups Aunt Jemima® Whole Wheat Blend Pancake & Waffle Mix
* 1/2 tsp. ground cinnamon
* 2/3 cup 2% milk
* 1/3 cup honey
* 1 egg, slightly beaten
* 1/4 cup vegetable oil
* 1 tsp. vanilla extract

The honey we have has congealed into a crystal-like concoction I decided to abstain from using. Instead I used Maple Syrup. I substituted a 1/2 cup of the WW mix for Bisquick. I added 1 tsp of cinnamon rather than a half. We use Non-Fat Skim milk, so I added in a little margarine. I also added in finely chopped apple. Once they were done I let them cool for a few minutes while tending the bacon, hashbrowns and eggs. I melted some margarine and mixed some cinnamon sugar together. Once the muffins had cooled enough to handle I dredged them in the melted margarine and rolled them in the cinnamon sugar. They actually turned out to be quite a nice substitution for the donuts, maybe even a tad bit healthier. They were a teensy-weensy dry, but that can be rememdied with an addition of a little water.




Once everything was ready the guys and I sat down and indulged in a good meal, and each other's company. This afternoon we went and saw The Hangover and indulged in a laughter.










We must live for the few who know and appreciate us, who judge and absolve us, and for whom we have the same affection and indulgence. The rest I look upon as a mere crowd, lively or sad, loyal or corrupt, from whom there is nothing to be expected but fleeting emotions, either pleasant or unpleasant, which leave no trace behind them.
~Sarah Bernhardt

soggy saturday

Before I forget I want to share with you the enlightening information that made my evening Thursday. I was talking to one of my classmates, telling her about probably receiving my first college C, in A&P, this semester. She pointed out that because I'm taking it from another school it will just come in as transfer credit!! How totally, without a doubt, awesome is that!? Of course I knew this, but hadn't thought about it. I got a 76 on the lab exam Thursday, and a 70 on the lecture exam. Hey, passing scores=happy nursing student! And as long as I pass the course with a C or better I'm golden!

Other good news is LB is seeing alot of playing time with the American Legion team he plays for. Last year he was the low player on the totem pole and didn't see much playing time at all. I really need to talk to him about how far he wants to go with baseball. If he wants to try and play in college he needs to do showcase camps during the summer. One, the experience is priceless. It only helps him to get better. Secondly, showcase camps do exactly that-they showcase a player. College coaches are often times present, if they're not already directly involved with the camp. Showcase camps tend to be pricey (for a 2-3 day camp you're talking $399 and up), so if he doesn't really plan to play in college it isn't worth it. If he does, we'll do what we can to help him.

I'm keeping this short today as we're spending what has started out to be a rainy Saturday inside watching movies. The guys are patiently waiting for me to finish up.

ring around the posey

Today I had my visit with the OBGYN, we'll call him Dr. B. First let me say it was kind of odd, because in the military OBGYN clinics/offices I've been to children are not allowed, but today moms strolled in with their wee ones in tow.

Anyway.

I sat there reading about the nervous system, you know that unit, the one I'll be lucky to test out of with a C! Then it was my turn and Dr. B took me back and I proceeded to fill him in on my woes of late. Long story, short: he's prescribed Ambien CR and NuvaRing, which I inserted and now I wont be taking OCPs. He gave it to me to insert on my own and then returned. He gloved his left hand telling me his left hand was for his GYN patients and his right is for his OB patients. Why yes, you better use your left hand then!!! Dr. B also wrote an order for a FSH test, so after my blood was drawn I promptly paid my co-pay and skeedaddled.

I'm quite proud to say I headed straight home. This might not seem to be quite a big deal, but let me fill you in on why it really is. Dr. B's office is amidst every store you could possibly want to spend money in, and I didn't want to spend money, so I left the area PDQ! It only took a little bit of effort.

I also wanted to share our latest addition to our backyard landscaping. It's coming along slowly, but surely. The mulch pile on the driveway still exists, but it is getting smaller. We planted in one side and Big B mulched it to his heart's contentment. The other side still has a couple of open spots, so it has yet to be completed with mulch. Big B was quite proud of his mulching job, as it was his first time throwing the woody bits. He did a mighty fine job!







The day lillies, salvia, achillea, coneflower and jacob's ladder were all brought around from the front yard, so they're in shock, and will hopefully make it through the transplant process ok. The larger day lillies are the ones that look the worst, although the salvia are just lying on the dirt rather than standing tall and proud as usual. I can't wait for the crape myrtle to bloom as it is a beautiful color, called "dynamite"! It's a brilliant, firecracker red.

Ho hum. It's time I get back to working on that C! The exam this time is in two parts. One is for lecture and the other is for lab. The lab exam is nothing more than labeling, which sounds easy, until you remember you are not that nervous system savvy! You know, there are some systems you get and some you don't get as much!

I did get approval for my community college to proctor my exams for A&P, so I don't have to drive up north, which wastes a lot of time. The exams are this Thursday. Wish me luck! Cs get the degrees! C=RN!

momentous maximus

There are those momentous occasions that make a parent wish time didn't race by at what seems like the speed of light.

first steps, first words, first time they go potty like a big girl or boy, first day of school, first time they go off to middle school and then high school, and...







...the first time they take the car keys to drive themselves to school.

Yep, he did it. I know he did because I called the finance office up at the high school to ask if he'd bought his parking permit for the day. I also emailed his homeroom teacher to make sure he made it to homeroom after parking in the student parking lot.

Girl can't help it...she's a mom!

Funny thing happened because of this momentous occasion...

As I'm outside watching LB drive off, AW is inside getting ready for school at the snail's pace that he exists in. He ends up running far enough behind that he misses the bus. Well, Big B has the Chevy, and you see from the above pictures that LB has the Pontiac.

We only have two cars.

My F-i-L hasn't brought the Malibu down for LB yet, so he's using our cars in the meantime. It's going on 9:30 a.m. and my juvenile delinquent is upstairs skipping school. The lady in the attendance office thought it was kind of funny. The county schools have a half day today anyway, because today is our high school's graduation.

After some studying, and LB's safe return home from school, we'll be heading out to witness another momentous occasion.

bright spot to my day!

This award is bestowed on to blogs that are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.

A big heartfelt thank you to Lorie for giving me this special award!! You really did brighten my dreary, tired day!

Now I get to dole out some love!

Thank you to all who have stood by my side since the beginning or even more recently. Your words of kindness have meant a lot!

my Canadian friend, and a recent nursing school graduate who rocks the ER and is preggers with baby number two! Running Wildly

Wise beyond his years, and kind of like the big brother I never had, Drofen at The First Strike

At Your Cervix, provides tales of her time in L&D, she is working on her midwifery degree

If I had a daughter I'd want her to have the heart and determination that Andrea over at snatc embodies

a fellow student nurse, who, like me has just finished her first year, as Student RN Tiffany puts it, she's "half a nurse"

someone I admire because she has to be one of the most grounded people out there, N is for Nurse

for her candor and humor LivingDeadNurses Psycho Ward

cuz we have some things in common Twelve Weeks at a Time

I can't stop at 8!!

can't forget this truly special lady Life is Full of Blessings

someone else I have tons in common with My Journey from a Student to a Nurse

Ok. I'll stop at 10! I really could keep going though. I've been fortunate to come across some wonderful people here in Blogland who have offered nothing but support. Now it's your turn to show some love!

No, no, no! One more....my friend who is working on her LPN A Journey Through Nursing School...& Beyond

I'm drowning in homework, since falling behind a tadbit this week...hoping to come up for air in the near future!

snickers

satisfies you!

Ok, usually I title my posts by the first thing that comes to mind in context of what I'm posting. Before I get to that reason, this time, the second thing that came to mind, was well the Snickers candy bar catch phrase.

I never proclaimed complete normalcy. If you wanted one word from me of self-description it would be "quirky".

So onto the real reason for this post.

Yesterday, I had to laugh (hence, "snickers") when the OBGYN office that I'm visiting next week called to reschedule my appointment for an earlier time.

Them: We need to reschedule you because Dr. SoandSo has an emergency c-section scheduled for that time.

Me: Emergency? Next week? (Thinking to myself, wondering how big of an emergency was a c-section that was scheduled one week away). Ok, what time can I come in?

Them: We have 9:45, 10:30...

Call me quirky, call me what you want, but I'd like to know when the definition of "emergency" changed? I thought an emergency c-section entailed mom and/or baby crashing, baby's heart rate decelerating, or whatever was happening that made the situation urgent and necessary to rush into surgery STAT!

a look at the bright side

I'm trying to stay positive, but it's been tough amidst the funky-funky-doldrums kinda mood I've been in lately. This weekend was a blessing as it kept us busy and left little time to ponder that which makes me unhappy, and alas I really don't have much to be unhappy about anyway.

It has to be the hormones...

Friday we went to see Land of the Lost with friends. It was the other mom, myself and 7 PWP (people with penises). We enjoyed the movie. There was very little I could remember from the TV show days. It was funny nonetheless.

Beware the Sleestaks

Yesterday we headed over to the same friends' house for an afternoon filled with a muddy football game, jousting in the jumpy castle, and a game of basketball. Oh, we can't forget the kids firing off the potato gun. It was a blast. No pun intended. It was so nice to get out of the house and just hang out with a fun group of people.

I should mention I decided to boycott homework all weekend! I'm going to give that a try every weekend. It's for the best.

Today we had the American Legion baseball season opener and it was a double-header. Our guys lost both games. It should be an interesting season. Our team will be one of the smallest. Most teams consist of a good amount of college players, as AL baseball allows Freshman in high school up through I guess the Freshman year of college. We have one college-aged player, and he's not the biggest guy on our team by any means.

Tomorrow I head out to the ENT doctor. Aside from that the week is pretty much uneventful...and I must have just taken a hit off someone's crack pipe! Lest I forget the boys' dental appointments Tuesday, a baseball game Thursday, and then there's Friday.

Not only is Friday our high school's graduation, it is also D-Day. We're not talking Normandy type, we're talking Driving-Day.

LB is legal to drive as of June 12th.

I'm. trying. to. think. positive...

as funks come and go

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for the support. I needed a bit of a kick in the seat of my pants. I think one thing's for sure, I wont give up simply because I don't want Nurse's Week to come around next year, when I'm supposed to be pinned and me not be there.

"...you'll have a greater sense of self worth because you finished and didn't stop...."

Need I say more?

fading fast

Honestly, I don't know how much longer I can go on like this. That sounds somewhat morbid, and probably a bit dramatic, but hey...roll with it.

Ten years. Ten years this coming August I will have been going to school, off and on...for ten years. That doesn't include the year I spent in medical assistant school from '97-'98. I know I've whined about this before, but seriously, I am so very burned out and these summer classes aren't helping.

Yesterday evening, as thunderstorms were setting in, the boys and I were doing our thing. Them, well they were doing what teenage boys do, texting, watching TV, checking the 'net (until I shut down the computers--as Chef Gordon Ramsay would say, "SHUT IT DOWN!!"), periodically arguing, all-the-while avoiding any homework that might need to be done and so on. Who says men can't multitask?

As for me? I was doing homework. At one point, as the power flickered off and then back on, I sat there thinking about how much fun it would be to go off and build a fort and tell ghost stories. Well, I don't even know if the boys would have gone for the idea. I'll never know, it seems. I had homework to do. You see, I've fallen a bit behind in my week's studies, so it was imperative I took some time last night to play catch up. As it was, since I'd shut down the computers, I had to do some of the work via my Blackberry. No, I don't have a laptop.

If I do go on with my schooling I will have to invest in a laptop. That's beside the point.

I say "if" because part of me would like to throw in the proverbial white towel on school. Some might see it as quitting, and literally it would be, but I would see it as taking a hiatus. It's never too late to go back.

Part of me wants to just work. It would be so nice to bring in an income and be able to accomplish some of those things that we can't, not on one income. I don't want to live in this house forever. The bathrooms are too small, we don't have a garage (or much storage, for that matter) and I would like a little more space between us and the neighbors. I know I shouldn't be complaining as there are people who are homeless or are losing there livelihoods. It is my blog and I'll complain if I want to!

Seriously though, there are several things in the house that need repair or updating. We've replaced carpet in two rooms, and the others need to be done. A long while back Big B ran the dishwasher with regular soap, it overflowed, and now the hardwood flooring under it (and quite possibly the subflooring) needs repair. The peninsula in the kitchen needs lighting. As it is when I work there I have to turn on the dining area light along with the kitchen light. Everything about the upstairs bathrooms needs refurbishing/updating. Everything. The Berber carpeting out in the great room, well let's just say it's n longer beige. It's Dalmatian. I would like to take the hardwoods and continue them through the dining area and on into the great room. We've talked about replacing the Formica countertops in the kitchen with granite or something to that effect. The bedrooms need to to repainted. All that and the landscaping needs to be finished. That will be the only thing accomplished in the near future.

More importantly I am still hung up on what I am missing with my kids. What more needs to be said about that? Sure, I'd be tired after working a long day, but aren't I already tired and having to study?

Yes, I would have to finish my summer classes. It would behoove me to do so anyway. If I were to take a "hiatus" and later decided to go back to nursing school I would still need these classes.

What intimidates me about staying in school? (There's always that too.) Besides the hours spent studying, there's always the risk of failure.

What do I want? Not even I know at the moment.

restless mind

Undoubtedly, the subject of insomnia is bound to come up at some point while one is in nursing school. It may be covered in psych class. It may even come up when reading about the nervous system while studying anatomy and physiology. Classmates may just proclaim they're experiencing many nights where they find themselves unable to sleep, unable to relax even.

Insomnia by itself is not a medical condition. It is a symptom caused by a myriad of possible diseases or disorders. When an individual experiences inability to fall asleep or wakes up during the night and is unable to return to a restful slumber they are experiencing insomnia.

It only makes sense that insomnia will intrude upon a person's sleep pattern when that person is experiencing high levels of stress. Stress, as well as anxiety are major causes of insomnia. Any nursing student can attest to the fact that nursing school equates to exorbitant levels of stress and anxiety.

Other factors induce episodes of insomnia. Sleeping in the same room with an individual who suffers from sleep apnea can cause disruptions for the unaffected partner. Seasonal changes, such as those causing hay fever, may awaken one during the night rendering them uncomfortable enough to fall back asleep. Everyday concerns might make it hard to fall asleep, or to get back to sleep after awakening.

Most nursing students lead lives more complicated than the role of nursing student defines them as. Many are parents, many work, and some have both familial and work obligations on top of the need to study for endless hours for that fluids and elctrolytes exam. Whatever the obligations, it all piles up and can lead to many a restless night.




I do not work outside of the home; however, plentiful responsibilites within beckon my name. I am the nursing student who sleeps with Darth Vader, aka Big B, the man with sleep apnea. If you've ever heard a CPAP machine you understand where I'm coming from. I also occasionally awaken because of allergy symptoms. There are many nights I have trouble falling asleep because a million and one thoughts are racing through my mind.

Just last night I awakened in the wee hours of the morning and those very thoughts inhibited my return to dreamland. In fact, that episode of insomnia is the catalyst for this post.

My episodes of insomnia are mainly anxiety related, if you hadn't figured that out by now. Big B asked me the other day why I don't ask to be put on something like Ambien. It's a good question. I do take diphenhydramine periodically.

The other night I woke up hot, and sweaty. It occured to me that it might be night sweats. For a woman my age that right there is enough to cause anxiety. It very well could be I am perimenopausal. Just skimming through information on perimenopause I see that I am riddled with a lot of the classic signs and symptoms.

Just wonderful. If nothing else that will keep me up at night. I guess I have plenty to talk to the OBGYN I'm seeing on the 15th about.

i can see for miles and miles and...

I've made my appointments for the otolaryngologist (ENT), OBGYN and gastroenterology and I must say, along with the traveling involved with American Legion baseball (yep, that's started up now), I am going to be seeing many, many miles over the next month!

June 8th, I see the ENT, in case I've caught you unaware, for my lump in throat feeling I've been experiencing for nearly 3 months now. According to Mapquest, it will take me an hour and 3 minutes to travel the 48.74 miles from home.

June 15th, I see the OBGYN, to get my OCPs/menstrual migraines/PMS under control. This trip will take 42 minutes, with a distance of 34 miles.

June 23rd, (if the ENT can't figure it out) I'll be seeing the GI doc. Thirty minutes, 24 miles.

blurry world

This morning I had planned on going to take Exam 1 for A&PII.

Let's back up a bit first, before I get on with my day. Last January we replaced one of the tires on our Chevy, because it had a hole in it. This January we replaced two others because of wear and tear. The other day Big B notices that the remaining tire, from when we bought the car in late 2007, was really low on air. He suspects there is a slow leak in it.

Sure enough!

This morning I get in to make my journey up north, about 40 minutes, to go take my test. (I had it planned just right--so that I'd be able to test and then head over to my ophthalmologist appointment.) As soon as I turn on the ignition the computer tells me to "check the RR tire". So I complied. It was at 12 psi. 12 psi!?!?!

Without panicking I headed to our local gas station (think Mayberry). I attempt to add air, but it's been a while since I've had to do that. I go in to find out what I'm doing wrong, and the lady who works there comes out and fills the tire to 35 psi. By this time I don't have time to go take the test first.

I really wanted to take that test first, before getting my eyes poked and prodded and my pupils dilated!!

There's a reason I named my blog Order and Chaos!

Ever had your pupils dilated? Ever attempted to take an exam, via computer after said pupils have been dilated? This is all not to mention how Dr. Poke and Prod had to manipulate my eyeball and skin around it, to inspect for any retinal tears. And this is all after getting the yellow dye dropped in. Final diagnosis is that I do indeed have a floater, and to live with it for another 2-3 months to see if gravity will take care of it. Otherwise, or if it worsens, I'm supposed to see Dr. Poke and Prod again.

As it was I didn't walk into the community college--the one I've never been to, but had to go to because it's where I'm taking A&PII from--with eyes that looked as jaundiced as a cirrhosis patient's! I did walk in with a left eye surrounded by reddened skin!

I did take that exam with blurry vision. If I didn't live so far away, and hadn't arranged to take it today whilst being in the same area for my appointment, I wouldn't have taken it.